As a novice writer, I have written many a fan-fiction. In fact, my first ever story was a Harry Potter fan-fiction, where I was Sirius Black's wife and were very happy together. We fought dementors together at a castle in Ireland. Then, I realized that I had gone completely MAD, and I threw it out. To this day, I will admit that I do write a fan-fic from time to time, though I don't flaunt them. A good friend and I are always cracking jokes about how Lestat and all the other vampires from Anne Rice's famed Vampire Chronicles would react if we showed them Twilight. (Trust me, it's not pretty.) But I digress. I am writing here today, AT MY VERY OWN COMPUTER, to say that though I approve of fan-fiction, not many authors do. Again, I will mention Anne Rice. On her facebook, she has said countless times that she HATES fan-fiction based on her characters. To Ms. Rice, fan-fiction steals her characters and makes them into something she never wanted. I applaud her for this, simply because she is 100% correct. In fan-fiction, most characters personalities are tweaked a bit. In my stories relating to the Vampire Chronicles I believe that I have stayed true to the personalities of the characters, but I'm not going to send any of these stories to Ms. Rice! Good Lord, she'd come all the way from California and slap some sense into me! *shudders*
We're going to play pretend now. Imagine you have just had a novel published. Think hard....(Oh, I see smoke! You're using your brains!) Anyway, you have just had a novel published and it is a New York Times Bestseller; Millions of copies have been sold, you've been praised with every award imaginable. Now imagine that fan-fictions are being written about your work, and your ever-faithful hero is being snogged by every woman imaginable. You'd be pretty ticked off, right? Right. So, although this may sound hypocritical, if I was an author, I wouldn't want my characters being whisked off into worlds they have no place being in. But, speaking as an occasional fan-fiction writer, Fan-fictions are a part of society. As a writer, sometimes it helps me blow off steam while I'm trying to get over writer's block from another story. I don't want my fan-fics published; I don't want them on the internet. I write them for fun; to get a good laugh or two. I most certainly DO NOT write fan-fiction to appease some sort of disgusting fantasy. (*cough* Twilight *cough*) My few fan-fictions are not romance in the slightest.
This is where fanfiction.net comes in. I HATE THAT SITE WITH THE BURNING PASSION OF A THOUSAND SUNS. Why, you ask? Because of all the sappy love stories written about characters whose personalities have been changed completely. I actually found a Potter fan-fiction once where George Weasley had given up being a prankster and sold the shop in Diagon Alley to become a Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. He married the Mary-Sue heroine and they had sex a lot. I honestly thought I was reading a 13-year old's version of erotica, it was vomit-inducing. (You could tell that they had been inspired by the Queen of the Mary-Sues herself, Stephenie Meyer.)
Now, I have a question for any of my readers out there: What are your thoughts on Fan-Fiction? Do you hate it/love it? I want to know what you think.
Atra esterni ono thelduin.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
'Write Like a Shmeyer Day!' Submission
As many of you fellow Twilight-haters know, 'Write Like a Shmeyer Day!' was just a short 3 days ago, thanks to the wonder that is facebook, and the wonderful Admin that is behind 'No, Twilight is not literature, or Quality Entertainment'. The day-originally-is celebrated in Washington in honor of Shmeyer's garbage heap-er, I mean 'novels'. Of course, being a fellow Twilight hater, Every fan of great literature teamed up with the famed FB group and dedicated the day to writing as disgustingly as Shmeyer, and by submitting their hilarious stories! I submitted quite a horrid paragraph or two, but sadly, I did not win. :( Ah, well. Maybe next year. Nevertheless, I am in quite a sickly fashion right now, as my sinuses are acting up and making me want to claw my face off. The pain...THE PAIN!! *hack* In light of this, I am going to be a mean, mean writer today, and am going to share my 'Write Like a Shmeyer Day!' submission. I hope it doesn't burn out your adorable little eyes. THIS IS A WARNING. READ ANY FURTHER AND YOU MAY EITHER DIE LAUGHING OR KILL YOURSELF FROM SHEER DISGUST. Enjoy.
My heart thumped fiercely behind my ribcage, pounding hard like a drum. Edward was gripping my arm so tightly I thought the tautness of his grip would tear my shaking arm off. I was shaking vehemently, and Edward's unspoiled body was cold; Like ice. Ice from the North Pole. His flawless face stared back at me, his golden eyes churning a deep honey color. "Edward, I...I think I'm in love with you. In love like you couldn't even fathom." His violent grip became even tighter as he gnashed his perfect, unblemished teeth, which were coated with a thick coat of scarlet blood. "Can't you see, Bella? I am a monster! A creature of the darkest depths of the darkest darkness..." He turned and punched a tree with his snow-white, perfect fist. "And I have fallen in love with the most beautiful and prettiest woman in all of the Earth. And so the lion fell in love with the lamb..." He mumbled, releasing his taut grip on my shaking arm and kissing me robustly with such force that I thought I might feint from the vigor of his lip-lock. "You are mine." he said, his delicious breath smelling sweet. "Mine and mine alone. I can't bear to let you be with someone else, the devastating covetousness drives me insane. Even when you're with your friends, my heart longs for thee." He said, making my jelly legs melt into the sullied dirt. "I'd leave anyone just to be with you." I said, and the shining sun broke through the sinister vines and branches of the dark forest, glaring on Edward. His faultless porcelain-white skin sparkled like diamonds, like precious gems. "Make me like you." I said forcibly. "I don't care if I have to leave my entire family and my closest friends." I snuggled closed to his cold, marble-sculpted chest. "If it means being with you, I'd give up everything that meant something to me." Edward chuckled, the sound deep and hearty. "That's all I ask, my love." He whispered softly, and stuck the needle into my chest, pumping my veins full of coursing immortal venom.
SEE?! I WARNED YOU!! But NOOO!! You had to insist on reading and now you've gone and blinded yourself!! BE GRATEFUL THAT SOMEONE SMART IS NOW READING THIS LAST PARAGRAPH OF MINE TO YOU!!
*ahem*
Anyways, I'm glad you've put up with this silliness. Today is not a good day for me; I'm sick, it's raining, AND I'M OUT OF VANILLA TEA. *eyes twitches then sneezes*
Screw (Insert state here), I'm moving to Montana to live in the mountains like a hermit. *sniffles and sneezes again*
.......Maybe not. I'm too poor. I think I'll just nap for an hour or so....anybody mind sending me some vanilla tea?
My heart thumped fiercely behind my ribcage, pounding hard like a drum. Edward was gripping my arm so tightly I thought the tautness of his grip would tear my shaking arm off. I was shaking vehemently, and Edward's unspoiled body was cold; Like ice. Ice from the North Pole. His flawless face stared back at me, his golden eyes churning a deep honey color. "Edward, I...I think I'm in love with you. In love like you couldn't even fathom." His violent grip became even tighter as he gnashed his perfect, unblemished teeth, which were coated with a thick coat of scarlet blood. "Can't you see, Bella? I am a monster! A creature of the darkest depths of the darkest darkness..." He turned and punched a tree with his snow-white, perfect fist. "And I have fallen in love with the most beautiful and prettiest woman in all of the Earth. And so the lion fell in love with the lamb..." He mumbled, releasing his taut grip on my shaking arm and kissing me robustly with such force that I thought I might feint from the vigor of his lip-lock. "You are mine." he said, his delicious breath smelling sweet. "Mine and mine alone. I can't bear to let you be with someone else, the devastating covetousness drives me insane. Even when you're with your friends, my heart longs for thee." He said, making my jelly legs melt into the sullied dirt. "I'd leave anyone just to be with you." I said, and the shining sun broke through the sinister vines and branches of the dark forest, glaring on Edward. His faultless porcelain-white skin sparkled like diamonds, like precious gems. "Make me like you." I said forcibly. "I don't care if I have to leave my entire family and my closest friends." I snuggled closed to his cold, marble-sculpted chest. "If it means being with you, I'd give up everything that meant something to me." Edward chuckled, the sound deep and hearty. "That's all I ask, my love." He whispered softly, and stuck the needle into my chest, pumping my veins full of coursing immortal venom.
SEE?! I WARNED YOU!! But NOOO!! You had to insist on reading and now you've gone and blinded yourself!! BE GRATEFUL THAT SOMEONE SMART IS NOW READING THIS LAST PARAGRAPH OF MINE TO YOU!!
*ahem*
Anyways, I'm glad you've put up with this silliness. Today is not a good day for me; I'm sick, it's raining, AND I'M OUT OF VANILLA TEA. *eyes twitches then sneezes*
Screw (Insert state here), I'm moving to Montana to live in the mountains like a hermit. *sniffles and sneezes again*
.......Maybe not. I'm too poor. I think I'll just nap for an hour or so....anybody mind sending me some vanilla tea?
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
10 reasons why Hobbits drink.
1.) They're tiny, so they get drunk faster.
2.) There's a different bar on every corner in Hobbiton
3.) Parties. Parties = alcohol, which = girls, which = HOBBIT DATES.
4.) Green Dragon. Duh.
5.) Gandalf can't live on 'just tea' when he comes to visit!
6.) Merry and Pippin without alcohol is like a horse without shoes: SILLY!
7.) Judging by Tolkien's description and by how Hobbits are portrayed in the films, they're Irish. Enough said.
8.) After saving Middle-Earth from utter destruction, a Hobbit needs a stiff drink!
9.) Because living on Lembas and water is boring.
10.) Oh you can search far and wide, You can drink the whole town dry. You'll never find a beer so brown But you'll never find a beer so brown As the one we're drinking in our town. You can kick your fancy ales. You can drink em by the flagon. But the only brew for the brave and true . . . Comes from the Green Dragon!
2.) There's a different bar on every corner in Hobbiton
3.) Parties. Parties = alcohol, which = girls, which = HOBBIT DATES.
4.) Green Dragon. Duh.
5.) Gandalf can't live on 'just tea' when he comes to visit!
6.) Merry and Pippin without alcohol is like a horse without shoes: SILLY!
7.) Judging by Tolkien's description and by how Hobbits are portrayed in the films, they're Irish. Enough said.
8.) After saving Middle-Earth from utter destruction, a Hobbit needs a stiff drink!
9.) Because living on Lembas and water is boring.
10.) Oh you can search far and wide, You can drink the whole town dry. You'll never find a beer so brown But you'll never find a beer so brown As the one we're drinking in our town. You can kick your fancy ales. You can drink em by the flagon. But the only brew for the brave and true . . . Comes from the Green Dragon!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Preparing for the PA Renaissance Faire 2010!
Evening, all! As you may have guessed by the title, I am preparing my costume for the 2010 Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire. :3
A good friend and I are going to the Faire next month dressed as...you guessed it, ELVES!
All I need now is the fabric for my tunic and the ears. I can hardly wait!
Until the day of the Faire, I'll keep you updated on elven fun. :3
Atra esterni ono thelduin!
A good friend and I are going to the Faire next month dressed as...you guessed it, ELVES!
All I need now is the fabric for my tunic and the ears. I can hardly wait!
Until the day of the Faire, I'll keep you updated on elven fun. :3
Atra esterni ono thelduin!
My thoughts on Videogames.
I love them more than oxygen.
Not really, but I am a videogame dork.
More on this later, I have stuff to do. *walks off to xbox*
Not really, but I am a videogame dork.
More on this later, I have stuff to do. *walks off to xbox*
Rowling VS. Meyer
At the age of five, my mother and I read Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone every night before bed. I can remember sitting on my bed, trying to hold the massive hardcover novel in my tiny hands, trying to figure out how to pronounce 'Voldemort'. I can remember waiting by my bedroom window for an owl with my letter from Hogwarts. I can remember hoping to see Albus Dumbledore walking along my street, flicking the lights out from suspicious Muggles. Since those nights, I have grown up with the Potter series, and now, at the age of fifteen, I am still a fan. Every year, I always seem to have at least one novel from the series in my locker for the occasions in which I simply MUST read a chapter or two. I can not list the countless times in which I cried from Sirius Black's death. I have always looked up to Ms. Rowling for her immensely hard work on the Potter series. She, much like the late Prof. J.R.R. Tolkien, created a world where magic ruled in the darkest of times, and the most unlikely heroes imaginable prevailed in the end by destroying evil. Both Ms. Rowling & Professor Tolkien empowered me to write. Without their work, I wouldn't be the aspiring writer that I am today.
Now, many people ask me why-seeing as I love the Potter series and am an avid fan of Anne Rice- hate the Twilight 'saga' so much. Well, to answer that question, I read the Twilight series.
To be perfectly honest, I did find amusement in the first book. I read it because I heard it was a decent novel. A few months after I read Twilight, I bought New Moon...HUGE mistake on my part. The entire 'novel' as some would call it, consisted of nothing but Bella Swan trying to kill herself because her sparkling love Edward Cullen left her for her own safety. I couldn't believe what I was reading. Chapter after chapter, the book just got more and more unrealistic and boring. I finished the book in about a week. The next several months went by, and a good friend of mine had just read Eclipse. Every day, she kept telling me how good the book was, and how it was impeccably different from New Moon, with more battles and action. After having enough of my friend's incessant whining, I gave in and read Eclipse. Quite frankly, I was surprised by how much better it was than the two previous books. I guiltily admit that I did enjoy it, though it wasn't my favorite series.
Then, I read something that would scar me forevermore, leave a malignant tumor of rotting idiocy on my bookshelf until I was finished. Breaking Dawn completely shattered my opinion on the series. (Mind you, I did always hate Stephenie Meyer's use of the word chagrin in every other sentence, and her so-called 'perfect' description of Edward Cullen.) The fourth novel was nothing but a disgusting lump of paper. Now, I always thought Jacob Black was strange, but to use pedophilia in a romance novel for teens? Stephenie Meyer, you are a disgrace; That completely crossed the line. Yet, all of her fans seem to think that Renesmee is 'adorable and a lovely child!' Is she really? I always seemed to think that Renesmee was a demon child who Bella had dreams about and who you basically knew about from page one. After I finished the book, I sat there at my desk, stunned, no words to describe what I had just read.
Many people asked me what I thought of the book once I finished, asking me, "Oh, didn't you just LOVE it?" and "OHMYGOD, Edward and Bella are vampires together and happy and have a child!" Yes. A demon child who is nicknamed after the Loch-Ness monster. Everyone around me was a rabid Twilight fan, and I was one of the many few who read the series as a guilty pleasure. I have been threatened countless times by not always carrying a copy of Twilight under my arm. (Sorry, but that place is reserved for a Rowling or Tolkien novel.) Quite honestly, Stephenie Meyer's writing style rivals that of an 11 year-old girl's fantasy of vampire fan-fiction. My love of the vampire myth will stick with Anne Rice novels, and her novels ALONE. Lestat would rip Bella's throat out before telling her she smelled of flowers. (Good Lord, blood smells like blood. Not FREESIAS.)
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Quidditch match to attend. Ravenclaw VS. Slytherin! I have a bet with the Weasley twins that Draco Malfoy will end up with a bludger to the head...heh.
Now, many people ask me why-seeing as I love the Potter series and am an avid fan of Anne Rice- hate the Twilight 'saga' so much. Well, to answer that question, I read the Twilight series.
To be perfectly honest, I did find amusement in the first book. I read it because I heard it was a decent novel. A few months after I read Twilight, I bought New Moon...HUGE mistake on my part. The entire 'novel' as some would call it, consisted of nothing but Bella Swan trying to kill herself because her sparkling love Edward Cullen left her for her own safety. I couldn't believe what I was reading. Chapter after chapter, the book just got more and more unrealistic and boring. I finished the book in about a week. The next several months went by, and a good friend of mine had just read Eclipse. Every day, she kept telling me how good the book was, and how it was impeccably different from New Moon, with more battles and action. After having enough of my friend's incessant whining, I gave in and read Eclipse. Quite frankly, I was surprised by how much better it was than the two previous books. I guiltily admit that I did enjoy it, though it wasn't my favorite series.
Then, I read something that would scar me forevermore, leave a malignant tumor of rotting idiocy on my bookshelf until I was finished. Breaking Dawn completely shattered my opinion on the series. (Mind you, I did always hate Stephenie Meyer's use of the word chagrin in every other sentence, and her so-called 'perfect' description of Edward Cullen.) The fourth novel was nothing but a disgusting lump of paper. Now, I always thought Jacob Black was strange, but to use pedophilia in a romance novel for teens? Stephenie Meyer, you are a disgrace; That completely crossed the line. Yet, all of her fans seem to think that Renesmee is 'adorable and a lovely child!' Is she really? I always seemed to think that Renesmee was a demon child who Bella had dreams about and who you basically knew about from page one. After I finished the book, I sat there at my desk, stunned, no words to describe what I had just read.
Many people asked me what I thought of the book once I finished, asking me, "Oh, didn't you just LOVE it?" and "OHMYGOD, Edward and Bella are vampires together and happy and have a child!" Yes. A demon child who is nicknamed after the Loch-Ness monster. Everyone around me was a rabid Twilight fan, and I was one of the many few who read the series as a guilty pleasure. I have been threatened countless times by not always carrying a copy of Twilight under my arm. (Sorry, but that place is reserved for a Rowling or Tolkien novel.) Quite honestly, Stephenie Meyer's writing style rivals that of an 11 year-old girl's fantasy of vampire fan-fiction. My love of the vampire myth will stick with Anne Rice novels, and her novels ALONE. Lestat would rip Bella's throat out before telling her she smelled of flowers. (Good Lord, blood smells like blood. Not FREESIAS.)
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Quidditch match to attend. Ravenclaw VS. Slytherin! I have a bet with the Weasley twins that Draco Malfoy will end up with a bludger to the head...heh.
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